The other day I was walking by an interesting bakery and thought, "That place looks fun. I should come back here some day." And kept walking. Several steps later, I stopped, literally, on the street, as I thought...why am I waiting? Why not go now? I was in no hurry; I was only heading home and S was even out of town, so I had no reason to rush anywhere. Why not go right then? So I made myself turn around and go. And I left with an interesting loaf of bread which is pictured above, and two cookies.The bread is some sort of corn bread, though not corn bread in the Southern sense of the food. It was an impromptu fun little experience and I am glad I took the opportunity instead of putting it off.
But what lingers with me from the experience is why is it that my immediate reaction was to not go then but to instead put it off to some undefined time? I was standing right by the bakery, so it was completely convenient, while putting it off would have meant a 15 minute subway ride followed by a 15 minute walk. Uphill. Just to get there, then the reverse to go home. So how is it that my brain somehow defaulted to the idea that putting it off for another day would be somehow easier or preferable??? I know my personality type tends to live in the future, and enjoys dreaming about possibilities and what might be...is this why my default was to wait? Or maybe, it is simply easier not to do something, even something I want to do, and tell myself I will do it later. But it just doesn't make sense to put off something so simple, inexpensive, and convenient.
So it is a little step, but I guess it is one more effort to more consciously and consistently live in the moment. Seasons of life pass so quickly, and I want to truly live, even and especially in these little quotidian moments.