Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Getting Ready: The Ideal versus The Reality

When I imagined the day of the wedding and the process of getting ready, I was hoping for something relaxing and non-stressful. In reality, things were not quite as calm as what I had envisioned. Which I guess might be normal?

I slept in until about 9 am, which was great because I was up until at least 2 am the night before, working with S to finish writing our vows and other last minute things. I had not slept too well for the week so before that (so not me!), so I felt pretty rested, considering. Bridesmaid M, Minister M, and I threw on clothes and went to the wedding venue to go set up. M and M started by tackling the icing of the cupcakes and I broke out the candles, vintage jars, bottles for the flowers, cake stands and trays, etc. We set up for a couple of hours. Somewhere around 1 or 2 pm we realized we should eat and head back to the hotel to get showers before the photographer showed up at 3 pm. So we got lunch at Ashton's, which is Québec fast food....not what I would have planned if I had thought ahead about lunch, but we were operating in the moment and that worked for us. But it was good and a funny memory now. Our friend V met us there and brought us the programs. Her family ate there too and S also came to join us for a quick burger. While S went back to the venue to continue the set up, we went back to the hotel to clean up and start getting ready. S spent the WHOLE day setting up: sound and tech stuff for two venues, making coffee, hauling full coffee pots, and a million other things. He worked right up until our first look.

While he was busy working, I was getting ready. M-E, S's best person, came over to do my make-up and straightened my hair while I talked with my long-distance matron-of-honor, K. It was so special to connect with her in that very liminal space before marriage.

Bridesmaid M and Minister M did all sorts of other things like folding programs, ironing my train, helping me look for things I had misplaced, loading stuff in my car, and probably a million other things that I don't even know about. M-E also was so sweet to help my mom get her hair done at a salon in Québec, even sticking around to act as interpreter between my mom and the stylist.

It took four people to fasten the buttons on my dress: my mom, my dad, Bridesmaid M, and Minister M. Finally Bridesmaid M had the creative idea to do it with tweezers.

Even though not many people saw them under the long dress, I LOVED wearing my red wedding shoes! And they were quite comfortable too. :)

Getting ready was not perfect- I forgot a few things (like my garter!) and I didn't have time to write thank you notes to the wedding party or relax or paint my finger nails. And we were running late. But the important stuff got done, with the most important being that in the end we were married. :) Even with the rush of things that happened before the wedding, it felt great to be surrounded by the most generous and caring friends and family during the entire weekend who all looked after us and worked together to get us married.

All photos in this post by Martin Dallaire.


  1. Wow I can so feel you on this post. Our wedding morning was SO not what I imagined or hoped it would be. Your poor Mr spending the day setting up!

    You do look really beautiful though. Those buttons look great - even if they were a pain to do up. Love your veil.

    And the red shoes - AWESOME!

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  3. @Mrs T,

    Aw, thanks.

    It is weird to be in the moment of the day,and things maybe don't go the way you envisioned and you just have to hop on the train anyways...? But I guess that's the reality not everyone talks about?