Time, Warped.

A fall day in 2018.

I sit drinking my coffee, listening to the guy playing the fiddle in the square below as the tourists pass him by. His repertoire is seemingly limited. Or maybe he only plays what "works" for his audience of vacationers. Whatever his reason, this guy plays non-stop traditional-Québéçois-sounding fiddle tunes. The next guy who will take over that corner after him plays piano. Last week, it was non-stop Pachebel's Canon. The fiddle stops, and a kid is screaming.

Eight floors above, I take another sip of my coffee and type, still somewhat drowsy. I woke up at 11:36 a.m. The bedroom is dark with the blackout curtain closed; it's easy to lose all sense of time.

August and Everything After...Is Unknown.

Somehow the months since mid-March have passed in a blur. A good blur. Like bokeh. The day I last wrote, I did indeed end up making madeleines that I gave to a friend for her 51st birthday. That evening at her party, I had a long conversation with her son. He seemed to be enjoying our talk, and I wondered if he might be interested in me. No, I told myself, he's younger...of course he wouldn't be interested in that way! But several weeks later, his mom put us in touch with an email, and we started emailing. Some weeks after that, he asked me on a date.

An update of sorts.

• Earlier this summer I was fired up to write a post about how I was seeing a lot of rudeness in society these days. But....eh. I decided not to.
• This is partially because we escaped away from it all and spent a month in Australia. A month in Australia can do remarkable things, including reducing levels of annoyance.

Photo credit: S

Photo credit: S

• See? It does wonders.
• The jet lag I had after coming back was the worst I've ever had. It took me ten days to get back on our Canadian time zone. But hey, it was fun staying up to dawn again; it had been an unbelievably long time since I'd done that.

By the way...

We went to Paris in May. I have been to Paris a number of times over the years, but it was S's first trip. After we got home, I drafted a long post about it and never published it, but now I don't feel like talking about the trip in the same way I did then, so here's what I feel like sharing now:

1. We had a good time and are certainly glad we went...
2. ..but it wasn't really the magically-perfect-sprinkled-with-glitter kind of trip that everyone imagines a trip to Paris with your amour to be.
3. However, there were moments of that: We saw the twinkle lights of the Eiffel Towel, wandered through Paris at night among all the beautifully-lit buildings, spent time in cramped bookstores packed with books from floor to ceiling, and sat on a bench by the Seine.
4. We especially enjoyed the crêpes and French Fanta, and savoured both frequently.
5. Yes....savoured is how that first came out when I wrote it. Oh, Canadian spellings, are you starting to rub off on me?
6. Wandering around off-beat places was usually more fun for us than visiting the over-crowded tourist sites, so S did not see every "must-see" sight that guide books tell you that you should see.
7. At the foot of Montmartre, we discovered what I am convinced is the best crêpe kiosk in Paris.
8. While we were there—on the day of the amazing crêpe kiosk discovery—we finally received notification that I was approved for permanent residence in Canada and we celebrated that night with a wonderful meal at a restaurant on the Left Bank.
9. I discovered the things I love about Paris have changed over the years, and I now really like the quieter, more everyday life Parisian scenes.
10. Similarly, my favorite crêpe is the beurre et sucre. Simple perfection with no distractions.
11. Staying in a (modest) hotel was absolutely wonderful, and quite the change from all my previous trips with youth hostel accommodations. It was so much fun to have our own little space as our "base" in Paris.
12. Here are a few photos. And you might have to look at the last one larger to see a funny thing in the photo.

Difference.

 

Does anyone else notice the way a particular packaged food sometimes tastes different in various countries? I strongly believe that Fanta is way better in Norway than in the United States. And this Snickers above? S brought it home from Japan and I happily ate it last week. My conclusion: Yum. But what I most picked up on was that it had more of a peanut-y taste, and less of a caramel-y flavor than a U.S. Snickers. Good, but noticeably different. 

I get a kick out of exploring international grocery stores and seeing all the new-to-me foods. I like to do this when I travel abroad, and when I find stores where I live that happen to carry good selections of international foods. One of my favorite grocery stores in Chicago seemed to be Greek-affiliated, and they had some delicious food in the deli and interesting stocked items from all over the world. And there was a Hungarian grocery store in the Chicago area that I wanted to check out, but sadly, I didn't get there before I moved. Thankfully, there are international grocery stores in Québec too. In Montréal, there are all sorts of fun places to explore. Last spring, I went with a friend to a Bosnian grocery store/diner-restaurant and had a tasty Macedonian Fanta (that made me think fondly of Norway) and a delicious vegetarian sandwich the cook made especially for me since pretty much everything on the menu included meat. Don't worry- he is the one that suggested the idea, all with a great sense of humor and slight aura of disbelief at my seemingly-odd-to-him preference of not eating meat. I was going to attempt to be low-maintenance and just get salad or fries or something on the menu, just to eat at this fun little grocery store/diner-restaurant, but he wanted to improvise a veggie sandwich for me on the spot. Experiences like eating that meal with my friend in that Bosnian establishment are something I value.  This desire to connect with people from other cultures, both in small moments, and in deeper relationships, is something that I appreciated from living and traveling in Europe and has now become part of my life. Last week I found an international grocery store in Québec, and after wandering through it to see all the interesting food it offers, I left with a new spring in my step and some fun food in my bag...feeling just a bit more at home here. I guess I was afraid that moving away from a large city like Montréal or Chicago would mean losing the international atmosphere I have grown accustomed to since my days in Europe, but I am happy to say that Québec also has its own international community which I am slowly discovering.

When I began living in Chicago years ago, I learned how to do that don't-make-eye-contact-with-me city attitude that is useful when you don't want to attract unwanted attention on the subway or while walking home alone at night. But then sometimes, I would stop and remember to be aware of all the people swirling around me as I make my way through life among so many diverse people, cultures, and languages. To concentrate on being present in my transitions. And when I was awake and open to the world around me, I was reminded of the overwhelming beauty of humanity in momentary, yet authentic connections with strangers. Quick almost imperceptible smiles, short conversations, shared subway seats, a exchange of a look of appreciation over a beautiful baby or adorable young child. A brief, friendly conversation in French, a second language for both me and the woman working at the international grocery store last week, and a promise to come back.

Those moments give me a quiet hope. These type of connections transcend differences like nationality, language, socio-economic or religious background, and a gazillion other cultural distinctions, and instead become a moment about recognizing and honoring our shared humanity. Though I may never know a person's story and how his or her journey through life brought them to that place, the moment itself has value and beauty. And sometimes those brief exchanges unfold into friendships. And slowly, a bridge is built by one authentic moment after another, and the lasting friendships that are developed over time. A powerful action of peace and love.

Naples Cars.

Wikitravel says, "Be forewarned: Traffic in Naples is nuts. It is the place where the social order breaks down and it is every man for himself (the traffic lights are usually ignored). You will find cars double and triple parked. Cars going the wrong way down one way streets. Traffic around the train station is nuts. Before attempting to cross the street, observe the locals. The idea is to spot a gap in the traffic and start across and hopefully people will stop. If this fails look for a pretty girl or a mother with young kids and let them run interference for you. Good luck"

Maybe that is why the cars in Naples look like this:

Traveling minimally.

My carry-ons

As I was planning to pack for our trip to Italy, I decided I wanted to try to be minimalist in my approach to luggage. I did not want to be weighed down by a huge roller suitcase and a carry-on. S is a pro at traveling for 3 weeks with only a carry-on bag, but for me, it was new territory to approach an extended trip with just carry-ons.* I am not minimalist and like to have various options of clothing to match my mood or weather or unexpected situations that might come up. But for this trip, I packed in a normal –sized backpack (my personal bag) and a small duffel bag (carry-on), which was significantly smaller than the normal carry-on-sized roller bags.


The way I was able to do this was due to the information I gained from fabulous website I stumbled upon called onebag.com. From there I learned so much, but here are the tips that I found most helpful for doing a two-week (or longer) trip with carry-ons:

1. Unless you are only going somewhere for a only few days, you will have to wash. I had planned on mostly hand-washing, but S wanted to go to a laundry mat halfway. Unfortunately, the closest laundry mat was a 20 minute bus ride and the hotel charges about $12 for one shirt to be laundered, so we decided to hand wash everything. Including jeans. 

Hotel Laundry Price List

Due to the fact that we were in a nice hotel (thank you, S’s work!), we were able to wash our jeans in the bathtub after they got salty and sticky after renting a boat and boating around the island of Capri. We washed them in the (thankfully very nice and clean) hotel tub with the detachable shower head. It worked surprisingly well. We washed the rest of the clothes in the sink, and then we let things air dry on the towel racks in the tub. Thank you, Woolite.

2. Only bring clothes that go together. Onebag.com suggests choosing a color family and bringing tops and bottoms that mix-and-match well. I went extreme with this idea, and only brought clothes in black, red, and white. (Aside from my one pair of jeans.) And to be honest, almost everything was black. Every top I brought could be mix-and-matched with every bottom. This was important to me because I wanted to maximize the variety of what I was wearing by being able to combine various things creatively. I choose items that would cover the range from a dress-up dinner or semi-elegant event to working out or hiking. Black is great for being versatile. And to be honest, I probably could have brought less tops. Maybe one or two less. Now I know. 


3. If you aren’t sure if you need it, you probably don’t or you can buy one after you get there. And there will probably be something you need that you did not bring, but that is likely, even with a huge suitcase. For me, that item was a cream for sore muscles/joints, because my left knee suddenly started giving me intense pain.  So I bought cream there (which ended up not working well, unfortunately). And I also bought disposable razors, since you can’t take them in a carry-on.


4. Be intentional about your packing methods.  I roll my clothes and have packed this way since backpacking in Europe AGES ago. It really does save room. And you can categorize stuff in gallon or quart size Ziplocs, or mesh packing bags, to help keep things organized,. I have used both methods. Small Nalgene 3-ounce bottles are wonderful for toiletries. Wear your heaviest/bulkiest clothes and shoes while flying to conserve space.


5. As onebag.com says, a fabric sarong-style wrap thing is actually useful. I was skeptical but decided to give it a try, since I have one. I ended up using it multiple ways over the two weeks and am now converted to this idea. I did not use the bandana I brought.


6. I love shoes, yet I managed to only bring two pairs. A pair of black Chacos sandals and a pair of red Converse. This worked for me. True, it would be nice to have some sort of elegant shoes, but I doubt I would have worn them if I had some with me. We walked a TON and elegant shoes and uneven cobblestone are not a good match. So my black sandals attempted to fill the place of “elegant shoes” and they sure were comfortable for “dressy” shoes. And they also worked quite well for hiking up active volcanoes.


7. I also like jewelry and accessories. But I mostly just brought jewelry that was not valuable monetarily. One set of funky earrings, one bracelet, and one necklace. The red sarong-ish scarf mentioned above, and another scarf. It was enough to make me feel like I could “dress up” but nothing that would ask people to mug me or whatever. And I ended up buying a cool bracelet as a souvenir too.

After this successful experiment in which I never felt like I was lacking anything I needed, I plan to try to travel light on future trips. It really was incredibly freeing and I think it all comes down to choosing the right things. By that I mean, things that can work in a variety of ways. Like my skirt with a pair of converse and and a cute t-shirt is great for exploring Naples, whereas if I wear the same skirt with a dressier black top, black sandals, and some accessories, it is a nicer outfit.

I think traveling minimally is in a way, counter-cultural. Well, actually living minimally as well. Now that I have traveled minimally and found it freeing, I am thinking about how generally simplifying is freeing and how a dependence on "stuff" seems like a safe thing (ie. having what you "need", you know,...just in case) but how too much stuff can actually be a burden.**

*Well, as an “adult,” anyways. I did backpack around Europe with a large backpack during college, but I had more stuff then than I had on this trip, and when I was backpacking, I was not prepared for any occasions that might come up where one might want to dress nicely. My challenge this time was to pull it off without looking like I was “backpacking” in Europe.
**Especially while moving.

Neapolitan donuts and wedding dresses.

By chance, we discovered some amazing donuts on a street in Naples that is FILLED with wedding dress boutiques. S was dismayed by all the wedding things, but I enjoyed looking at the dresses as we walked by. The donut, however, was the highlight by far.* It became the most talked about donut we have ever eaten, and I even went back two more times to get more of them later in the trip. The were only $.30 Euros, and they were amazing. Better than the similar looking donuts in other places of town.

Italians seem to enjoy weddings, judging from this street that brought to mind St-Hubert in Montréal. During our trip we even saw several couples in wedding apparel having pictures made and one wedding in process in a cathedral in Sorrento.

While returning to Via Duomo for more donuts, I saw this couple who picked up a wedding dress on a moped.

*After we got home that day, we used this photo and Google maps and street view to find the street where we had found the donut. We returned back to find the exact shop, but couldn't find it because they were closed on Sunday. I later went back (twice) and found the place. Yum.

Graffiti...

The texture of peeling paint,

fluttering sheets hanging from above,

layers peeling back revealing

History.

Inhaling ancient dust

amid the roar of mopeds and constant traffic.

Graffetti marking place and time on non-descript concrete,

resisting the temporal with a permanent

I.

Was.

Here.

Italy: Part 5

In my opinion, the best pizza in Naples is at De Matteo's.**

Hotel back stairway, or Not A Youth Hostel.***



Night view from our hotel rooftop.

*Yep, we went up to the top of Mt. Vesuvius. The original plan was to hike up the whole thing, but due to the tourist information office being closed and a lack of helpful signage, we decided to pay to get a bus to take us close to the top, and then walk up the last 25-ish minutes to the actual top. This was perfect for me because I was having knee pain, so hiking the whole thing would have likely been impossible for me anyways.

**We tried pizza at many restaurants in Naples, and I came to appreciate the wonderful taste of the crust and the flavor of the "char" of  Neapolitan pizza. The simplicity of the Margherita pizza is really quite wonderful. But it is not my favorite pizza in the world...I remain a big fan of Lou Malnati's.


***I am still in awe that we had such a nice paid-for hotel room. Staying in a four star hotel is definitely different (and better) than my former youth hostel travels. Though there are certainly fun things to youth hostels, like meeting people from all over the world and getting to tell stories later about the places you stayed in with roaches (Paris) and bed bugs (Rome), and the one that was said to be haunted (Bergen). I guess the good stories make up for the lack of luxuries.

Italy: Part 4

For about 13 years, I had wanted to go to Pompeii. I had intended to do it back in my back-packing days of yore, but ended up loving Ireland so much that we skipped going back to Italy. So Pompeii went on the list of things to do one day. And that one day was during our recent trip. Pompeii is HUGE and it was just amazing to be in the presence of remnants of life from an era so long ago and to imagine life as it might have been like then.

Some questionable "young reading":

Photo credit: S








Ancient amphitheatre


Mt. Vesuvius looming in the background. It is still an active volcano.

Italy: Part 3

One day we took a ferry to Capri. There are parts of the island that are very touristy, and other parts where you suddenly find yourself hiking in the middle of nowhere. It was beautiful, and I most loved the remote areas.

The adventuresome group of guys I was with wanted to explore the island on moped. The moped rental place wouldn't rent to us because of our inexperience and how it is apparently dangerous. Turns out this was probably for the best, because much of what we ended up seeing you could only do by foot anyways. After exploring the island on foot, the next plan was to rent a boat to see Capri by sea. When we went to inquire, there were no questions about our experience with boating. The woman explained which way to go around the island and that we could drop the anchor and swim up to stuff if we wanted. She also said not to get too close to the rock cliffs. She asked for an ID from somebody.

This was not something I would have done, but I decided to do it even though I wanted to back out. Sitting on the beach sounded much more fun to me. We got in the boat, shoeless, as the guy requested, and then he took us out away from the dock to his other boat. He said, "Here is the starter. Forward, reverse, neutral, steering wheel. Anchor." And then he hopped in his other boat and left us there in our boat. S was our captain, and he did a great job. I frantically began passing out life vests to everyone. Despite my fear, it was pretty amazing, and the views were incredible. Those rock cliffs and archs are quite impressive. I was gripping the boat the entire time because of the rocky waves during many parts of the ride. Towards the second half of our 2 hours out, weather got bad kind of quickly and they sent a guy out to check on us and ride back along side us to the docking area. That was a relief, because I figured if we were flung out of our boat, he could help or go get help or whatever. Anyhow, we survived and it was definitely an adventure I won't forget.

Italy: Part 2

People have a lot of things to say about Naples, and it is not one of the main tourist attractions in Italy. People tend to go to Rome, Venice, and Florence. Which are great cities, but I enjoyed Naples, perhaps largely for the fact that it was not as over-run with tourists as these other cities. You get to see people from Naples going about their lives in their city. Pretty great, actually. There are a couple of articles, here and here, that I feel describe the city well. S and I both enjoyed our explorations of the city.